Poor Piccolo
by NamekNailGirl
Summary: Piccolo has a crazy day involving the z team.
1. Poor Piccolo

Hi this is my first fic so be nice please ^_^! I had a little to much leftover turkey when I made this so it might be a little umm out there-.-.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Dragonball Z Akira Toriyama does and I have no money so don't try to sue. Though I wish I did*snffile*.  
  
Poor Piccolo  
  
It was a peaceful spring day and all the birds where singing. Piccolo sat under a waterfall meditating enjoying the calm, though we all know that won't last for long. " PICCOLO!!!" Piccolo snapped out of his meditation to find the source of the voice. "Who's there?" he yelled still looking around for whoever was calling him. "It's me THE GREAT SAYIAMAN!!" yelled Gohan as jumped out of a tree landing in front off Piccolo. "You got into sacred water again didn't you" Piccolo said as he to Gohan. "No Piccolo I was just wondering if you wanted to enter a posing contest with me?" Piccolo replied "No I don't!" "Oh well already signed us up together!" said Gohan with a cheesy smile. "YOU WHAT?!!" yelled Piccolo. "I see we'll have to do this the hard way, VEGETA!" yelled Gohan and Vegeta walked out with a trench coat on. "What the- AHHHHHHHHHHHH" screamed Piccolo running around like a maniac. "I'M BLIND!" he screamed before running into a tree.(a/n lets just say he did a different kind of Final Flash-.-.)  
  
When Piccolo woke up he nearly fainted from what he was wearing. He had on a lime and dark green Sayiaman with a lime green helmet on his head. " WHAT IN THE NAME OF DENDE AM I WEARING?!!" excliamed Piccolo. "Stylish isn't it." Said Gohan "oh and by the why you have a ki collar on so you can't fly away or anything." " You've got to be kidding me how could thic day get any worse?!" unfortunately for Piccolo his question was about to be answered.  
  
So what'd you think? Please review, review, review ^_^! 


	2. Pimpy McPimpster

Disclaimer: you know the drill I don't own it, but I do own a Piccolo statue ^_^!  
  
Chapter 2 Pimpy McPimpster (in honor of my friend Alex B.)  
  
As Piccolo feared the day got worse as he saw Goku, Krillan, and ChiChi walking up to them. "Oh my Dende" was all Piccolo could say at the sight of them. Goku had on a white fur coat, with a white fur hat with a leopard rim on with a feather in and some white pants, with white shoes, a blue shirt, and gold dragon head cane. In other words he was dressed like a pimp. Krillan had some saggy blue jeans with a black shirt and a black cap turn to the side and gold around his neck. ChiChi had on an orange mini skirt with a spaghetti strap tank top. " Please tell me I'm having a nightmare" groaned Piccolo putting his hand to his head. "Hey Piccolo wanna go for a ride in my pimpmobile?" said Goku to Piccolo. "How about HELL NO!"  
  
"Ok no need to get touchy about," said Goku backing up a little. "Do I even wanna know why you all are dress like that?" said Piccolo "I mean it looks like your name should be Pimpy McPimpster in stead of Goku!"(A/n my friend said it so I decided to put it in the story lol ^_^). " And as far as you to go I'm not even going to start cause it's not worth it." he said then stormed to find someplace peace though that won't happen for quite a while. He was just about to leave the building (a/n just so you know they're all in this big building sorry for not mentioning it earlier) when he saw Vegeta walking around still in a trench coat. Remembering the incident earlier he headed on the other direction bumping into one of the last people he wanted to see today.  
  
Ok that's all you get sorry writer's block feels like rearing it's ugly head for now. Review, review review please^_^!!! 


	3. Toga time

Yamcha fans be warned! Do Not I repeat, Do Not read this chapter! Disclaimer: You know the drill I no own so let's just skip it.  
  
Toga time  
  
"Hey Piccolo what's shaken?" asked the person. " Dende I swear I'll get you for this!" Piccolo said shaking his fist in the air supposedly at Dende. " Awww poor piccy do you need Yamcha to make it all better?" he said slowly inching closer to Piccolo. "No say away you toga wearing freak!" screamed Piccolo run around the building like a mad man from the toga clad Yamcha and then ran into a pole and got knock out yet again.  
  
When he woke up he wanted to go back to sleep and think it was all a really bad nightmare. Of course it wasn't. Piccolo was wearing a white toga with a gold green sash and was in some type of coliseum. Candles also surrounded him and there was a bath about 10 feet away. "Where the heck am I?" he asked bewildered by his surroundings. "Welcome to the toga club!" said Yamcha opening his arms as if to hug Piccolo. "Argg this is the second time this has happened to me today!" he yelled clutching his head.  
  
"Hehehe this is so much fun," said the teenage namek dancing around like he had ants in his pants. "For once I got sick of torturing Gohan (a/n more Gohan threatened to kill him if he didn't-.-) so I now declares this declare Torture Piccolo month!" Dende laughed insanely (a/n aww poor piccy getting tortured by Dende. Opps on with the story!) while he started dancing around again. "When he ever learn?" Mr. Popo said while shaking his head from side to side sighing.  
  
Ah well that's it for this chappy cause I'm too sleepy from staying up from yesterday till today and I need ideas for up coming chapters. All suggestions welcome^_^! You know what I want reviews ^_^! 


	4. Jolly Green Giant

NNG: Hi all sorry I didn't post earlier trying to keep my grades up as usual, and trying to get the new computer broken in^_^. So here's the next- Piccolo:(just finished reading chapter) WHY THE (censored) ARE DOING THIS TO ME!! NNG: because it's funny. k.i.s.s.m.: When people walk up to me and say "hey little buddy" and hit me over the head with their hat that's not funny that hurts! (Laughing heard) Stop laughing at me! NNG: Okkk ki.s.s.m. time to go back in your closet. k.i.s.s.m.: It's a secret lair! NNG: yeah what ever shoves in her "secret lair". Ok now on with the- Fizz***QT: hey what about me! NNG: Umm (shoves her into the "secret lair") Ok now on with the fic-.-. P.S I don't own DBZ.  
  
Jolly Green Giant  
  
While being chased around by a hug happy Yamcha Piccolo suddenly got an idea. "I'll fly out the window," he said while heading towards the balcony and jumping off realizing a little to late about the ki collar on him (a/n I forgot where I put it on him-.-).  
  
"Ahhhh I forgot I can't fly!!!" he said while plummeting to the ground at 100miles per hour then finally smashing into and got knocked out (a/n yet again-.-). When he woke he in a studio still in a toga with cameras everywhere.  
  
"It's about you got here and what's with the toga?"  
  
" What do you mean, "It's about time I got here"?"  
  
"Ugg forget it wardrobe!"  
  
"Wardrobe? What-" Piccolo was stopped short as he was bombarded by make and costume people.  
  
"There much better, lights, camera, and action," said the director as the people cleared away from Piccolo and the cameras rolled.  
  
"What am I wearing?!," yelled Piccolo as looked down to see himself in a Jolly Green Giant costume.  
  
"CUT, CUT, CUT, your wearing the costume you've been paid to wear" said the director.  
  
"Paid?" questioned Piccolo  
  
"Yes paid" said the director pulling out Piccolo's paycheck.  
  
"Ha! There isn't enough money in the-" he stopped as he say all the zero's (a/n I know they don't get paid that much but work with me people-.-). " Ok I'll do just give me my script" he said while thinking of all the year's supply of water he could get with that money. So they got the commercial done and Piccolo got his paycheck (a/n corny I know but I couldn't think of anything else-.-).  
  
"Well at least I have a paycheck now but what ever happened to my clothes?" he questioned out loud.  
  
" I could give them to you for a price" said a mysterious voice from an alleyway.  
  
"Huh?" said Piccolo said as turned to face the voice. ________________________________________________________________________  
  
Ok that all you get today. Got to finish up my project so I don't fail-.-. Well you know what to do click the little review button and tell me what you think of it^_^! BTW I'm, now having a vote on what to do next.  
  
Have the mysterious voice be another Z warrior. Just keep the person a mystery and make Piccolo go on a ridiculous quest. Have a frying pan hit him coming out of nowhere on him get knocked out again as usual. Your own suggetion. 


	5. Let me see your hat

NNG: Hello all I'm finally back^_^! Alex B (Bunny): Inuyasha Rules! *starts writing Inuyasha all over her hands* NNG: You again! I thought I told you to stay in your "secret lair"! *shoves her into a closet* Ok now that that's over we can- Rachael: Hey where is Alex! She took my inuyasha plushie! NNG: *sighs and points to closet then shoves her in too* Ok now maybe we can- Jennifer and Icee (Icee-chan): *both walk in at the same time* NNG: umm why are you two here? Jennifer: Well I just came to read the fic, but she wants to kill for locking her in a room with all those annoying people for a month. Icee: DIE!!! NNG: AHHHHH! *says while running* Well on with the fic hope you enjoy this chapter. YIPE! *yells while ax narrowly misses her* Icee: GET BACK HERE! Let me see your hat (dedicated to Jennifer k.)  
  
"Hey buddy want your clothes back," said the mysterious voice and held up Piccolo's clothes.  
  
"Of course I do but how did you get a hold of them?" he asked trying to grab his clothes from the stranger only to fall flat on his face and have the stranger jump on top of a building near by and laugh at him.  
  
"You have to do something for me first though," the stranger said.  
  
"What?" said Piccolo holding his face looking through his fingers at the stranger.  
  
"Let me see your hat" he said plainly.  
  
" You've got to be kidding me," he said while a sweat drop formed on the back of his head.  
  
"I need your hat for my MUSICAL!" yelled the stranger throwing of his trench coat (a/n don't worry it's not Vegeta thank Kami! I still hate myself for that-.-.) revealing Chiaotzu.  
  
".rightttttt" said Piccolo another sweat drop forming on his inching away from Chiaotzu.  
  
" I see you won't make this easy," said Chiaotzu shaking his head.  
  
"Chi-Chi!" he yelled at air.  
  
" Why are you calling-" Piccolo's sentence being cut short by a frying pan to the head, causing him to be knocked out yet again (a/n sorry it's just a habit now to do this to him. "It's a frog's life" in the words of Dr. D of Zoids-.-).  
  
"Ugg I feel I just got hit by a Kamehameha wave," said Piccolo holding his head. When he looked at himself in a mirror near by and just sighed. He was dressed in a white suit with a matching white hat with white shoes.  
  
"Why do I even bother getting up," he said quietly to himself. He was in a huge theater off stage behind the curtain. People on stage were practicing a chorus line number.  
  
"You call that a kick?! I've seen drunk monkeys do better, now do it again!" yelled Chiaotzu was currently dressed in a leotard and leg warmers (a/n not a pretty picture trust me-.-).  
  
"Ahhh my star is finally awake," said Chiaotzu hugging Piccolo before he could stop him.  
  
"And don't worry your turban is in glass container on stage," he said pointing to it.  
  
"Ok I'm closing this play down!" boomed a loud voice from the entrance. Thousands of troops stormed in nearly filling the whole place up.  
  
" Lieutenant Blueberry and Blackberry secure all exits!" said Commander Raspberry.  
  
"Yes ma'am!" they said following her orders.  
  
"General Cranberry secure the turban!" she yelled at the general.  
  
"Yes ma'am!" she said quickly retrieving it from the stage.  
  
"Cornell Strawberry secure the Namekian Piccolo!" she bellowed.  
  
"Yes ma'am!" she answered enthusiastically tying him up and gagging him.  
  
"Who are you people and what are doing here?" asked a none to happy Chiaotzu to the commander.  
  
"We are soldiers in Dende's army!" she yelled putting a hand to her head as if ready to salute someone. She then side step to allow none other than Dende to walk through the doors dressed in camouflage wear and a small mustache on his lip.  
  
"Hail Dende!" said the commander.  
  
"Hail Dende!" yelled the rest of the army.  
  
"Dende you little dement bas-" said piccolo though his sentence was cut off by Dende.  
  
"Temper, temper Piccolo. Is that anyway to talk to your Brother?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" he laughed evilly.  
  
  
  
*gasp* Dun dun dunnnnnnnnn! His brother could just be the rumblings of a mad man, or could it be the truth? Tune for the chapter of Poor Piccolo! So push the button and review review review ^_^! 


	6. Mojorific Baby!

I'm sooooooooo sorry that it took me so long to update-.-. I had to make sure I didn't fail any classes or anything-.-. This is going to be a two part chapter just because I'm too tried to put the whole thing in one chapter and I have to add some the request my friends had-.-. well enough er typing and on with the fic^_^!  
  
Mojorifc Baby! Part one: groovy room!  
  
Piccolo found himself in a tie-dye colored room staring at a lava lamp. "Aren't the colors freaky man" said the person next to him.  
  
"Yeah. hey wait a minute! What happened to the scene I was just in(I loved that part in this one episode of Tenchi Universe^_^)?!" exclaimed Piccolo.  
  
"Chill it's all groovy. You need to relax." Said the same person.  
  
" What do you mean re-" he stopped as soon as he realized who it was and how they were dressed and himself. It's was Radditz wear his hair in a pony tail with pink and yellow flowers all over his jeans, blue jean vest and his left cheek. Piccolo had on a brown swade (sp?) vest and the same pants as Radditz only with light green flowers on them.  
  
"Why is everything happening to me?" he asked to no one in particular with his head in his hands.  
  
"Hey it's not that bad here in the groovy room. The best perk is all the free love." He said with a wink as he waved a girl over in sliver go go boots, a tight sliver tank top and skirt, and sliver bunny ears on her head.  
  
"What do you need from me this time?" asked the girl batting her eyes at Radditz.  
  
"I need you show my good friend all the free love here Bunny" he said smoothly.  
  
"Groovy I loveeeee green" she said winking at Piccolo.  
  
"@_@ I gonna pretend I'm back at home meditating and this all just a bad dream" said the namek closing his eyes.  
  
"Awww but it's much more fun both people participate," said Bunny sitting in his lap.  
  
"Plus my name is Platinum Bunny and I'm a WHOLE LOTTA WOMAN!," she declared snapping her fingers.  
  
"Hey Ice Brownie Mocha (IBM (a/n a just realized that-.-.)) it's time to dance!" she yelled at a girl with a giant afro, no shoes, brown crop top and tight brown pants that laced down the sides. Suddenly Piccolo felt like a sandwich between the two now dancing girls.  
  
"Please help me" he pleaded to Radditz.  
  
"Just go with the flow and use your mojo," Radditz said smoking a pipe. Then a another person emerged from the door.  
  
Ok that's all you get reviewers get right now. You know what I need. Other wise I can't get off my lazy bum and type the rest^_^! 


	7. Mojorific Baby Part 2

Hey NamekNailGirl here^_^! I want to say thanks to everyone who has reviewed this story so far. I decided to not be lazy this time and update sooner than I usually do. Brownie-luving Icee-chan (BLIC): You got that right! NNG: You want to die today don't you*glare*. BLIC: *in high squeaky voice* Ummm no-.-. Bunny: Can we get to the story already*munches on carrot*? NNG: What do you know. You finally said something intelligent-.-. Bunny: Shut up! _ NNG: just kidding *cough* not really *cough*-.-. Now on with the fic^_^!  
  
Mojorific baby! Part 2:  
  
"Hey Nappa my man. What's up?" said Radditz greeting his buddy.  
  
"Just been chill with these two lovelies," said Nappa while winking.  
  
"My name is Plum," said the girl on his left.  
  
"Mine is night star," said the girl on his right.  
  
"Welcome to the groovy room ladies, you can join my new friend Piccolo on the dance floor if you want," he said point to our favorite namek trying to get out of the hold of IBM and Platinum Bunny.  
  
"Help me please!" yelled Piccolo still trying to escape their clutches.  
  
"Did someone call for help?" said an amazingly cheesy voice.  
  
"No, it can't be," he said sweat dropping.  
  
"I am the Great Saiyaman!" said Gohan busting in through the roof.  
  
"Groovy costume dude" said Radditz giving the thumbs up sign.  
  
"Why thank you good citizen" said Gohan saluting him.  
  
" Now what person was in need of my assistance?" He questioned looking around.  
  
"Umm never mind I think I'll be fine after all" said Piccolo sweatdropping completely forgetting the girls making him into a sandwich.  
  
~Look- I mean Secret Bass of Operations~  
  
"Mmmm this is getting boring let's knock him and send him some where else now." Said Dende.  
  
"Aye aye sir" said Lieutenant Blueberry punching in some coordinates in a super computer and launching a missile.  
  
~Groovy Room~ Meanwhile Goha- err I mean the Great Saiyaman had completely forgotten why he was there in the first place and just started posing for no reason. Also the girls had finally stopped dancing and Piccolo felt extremely violated from the experience.  
  
"I don't think my day could get any worse" he sighed staring at the lava lamp. Just then a missile came out of nowhere, hit Piccolo in head knocking him out (yet again-.- I've got to stop doing this to him-.-) and then exploded.  
  
~Somewhere~ "Ugg where am I?" asked a groggy Piccolo to no one in particular.  
  
"Hehehe the important thing isn't where you are it's what I'm going to do to you! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" said a dark mysterious.  
  
"Not again" he groaned looking up at the person.  
  
Hahahaha that's all you get cause I'm to lazy to write anymore^_^! I normally would ask questions I'm not gonna answer but I too lazy for that now-.-... ok maybe just one. Who is the new mysterious voice? What is Piccolo wearing this time? Why did ask more than one question? You have review to find out^_^! 


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